Nico (vilakins) wrote,

You know you're from New Zealand when...

I've read several interesting "you know you live in wherever" posts about various US states and countries, so here's mine.

Go to Google, type in 'you know you're from (insert country or state)and copy the jokes you find listed. Bold the ones that apply to you.

I found bugger-all (see, I'm already slipping into dialect) so I used some of what I did find plus some more I thought of.


You know you're from New Zealand when...

You know what to do in an earthquake: get into the nearest doorway before any other bugger and say, "Nah, i don't reckon it's the Big One this time. We'll be right".

You can hum the theme song to Fair Go and Country Calendar. - Greg can.

People think you're a flightless bird. - And I bloody hate, hate, hate that.

People in other countries don't know what season it is here.

Christmas means salads, or a barbie on the beach.

You know what apples really taste like (and that there are more than four different kinds).

The only good thing about winter is the lack of mosquitoes.

You're seen Split Enz, or former members thereof, performing live at least once.

You reckon anyone who carries on about how great they are is up themselves. Or Australian.

You wear togs to go swimming, and jandals on your feet.

You use "mate" as a greeting, affectionate nickname, and exclamation, like Americans do with "dude".

The name "Chappell" still outrages you. - Only when I see the footage replayed.

You know someone who worked on The Lord of the Rings or Xena.

You wish Fitzy, Zinzan and Josh were still playing for the ABs.

The word "bugger" is so acceptable it appears in well-known TV ads.

The dairy sells a lot more than just stuff from cows.

You've rolled Jaffas down the aisle at the cinema as a kid.

You know you're horribly lost if you've been driving for more than two hours without the scenery changing to something completely different.

The words "NZ cricket victory" just don't sound right, somehow.

You don't think twice about barefooting it to the supermarket
. - only on a holiday at the beach, mate,

Everything has to go in the fridge or it'll go mouldy in a couple of days.

As soon as you saved the airfare, you buggered off on The Big OE (Overseas Experience)...

...wearing a t-shirt saying, "London, New York, Paris, Rome, Eketahuna".

You can put up with--or even like--the sound of rain on a corrugated iron roof.

The idea of living more than two hours away from the sea is foreign to you.

Hokey-pokey is your favourite ice-cream flavour.
- one of them.

You don't get dressed up to go to town or the theatre/opera/symphony orchestra.

You listen to the weather forecast before choosing your clothes. - I have an electronic barometer I consult.

You know someone who left their own wedding celebrations to watch a rugby game on TV.

You support any team that plays Australia.

You went into withdrawal and shock when you arrived in the UK and found that no one knew what a flat white or a long black is.

Proper hamburgers have lettuce, tomato, onion, and beetroot in them.

Tags: nz
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