Written for last week's b7friday Warren Zevon song title challenge, using this one...
I saw this vid show about karma a few months ago. Lot of rubbish really, but I didn't have much choice, lying there flat on my back after being shot in it, and the surgical unit staff in control of the vid. Look, if karma was real, bad people would have bad things happen to them and good people (or harmless ones) would be rewarded, but you don't see a lot of that about, do you?
Still, it made me think. After all, what else was I going to do while my fried vertebrae were regenerating? It was tempting to think of what happened to us as karma getting back at Avon for being such a bastard, but it was just a mixture of bad luck and cause and effect, and I have to admit that some of it's my fault. Now I don't count being a thief as bad because I only ever robbed rich sods who could afford it, and you could see that as evening out the karma really. Hah, me as an agent of karma!
That's when I got the idea. I decided to think up all the things I'd done wrong, the big things mind, not stuff like nicking Avon's brandy. Things that made the past worse.
So I've made a list.
- Dropping my gun. If I hadn't done that, we might have taken over the London and ended up on a nice safe planet well out of Federated space. Well, safer than the ones we've been on anyway.
- Hiding Orac and getting drunk on Space City. I had a good time over there and it's about the only one I feel guilty about.
Letting my terror of suffocation and small places (all due to being locked in a fridge as a nipper) take over on that Exbar hole so I told Travis the word.I dunno, though. It got rid of two psychos so I'd say that one was a plus in the end. I'll scratch it.
- Not capturing Servalan when she was all tied up.
- Saving Orac when the poor old Liberator was eaten. I blame him for a lot of what went wrong including that shuttle and us going to Gauda Prime and crashing on it.
- Not saving Cally too.
- Get Orac, the little bastard, to shop Sleer to the Federation government along with some damning evidence about her little games with Zerok gold. That takes care of #1 (makes the galaxy a bit safer for your average rebel) and #4.
- Set the explosive charge Avon put into Orac so that I can set it off with a code word, and let him know. Then get him to cause havoc in the Federation ranks instead of ours. That's #5 off the list.
- See what I can do for the Auronar orphans on Kaarn--preferably from a distance--and put a clause in my will to have my teeth made into a necklace and left on Terminal. That's #2 and #6.
My name is Vila. I'm just trying to put things right.