Nico (vilakins) wrote,

Crossover conversation meme

OK, here are the conversations requested for the crossover conversation meme:

Give me two characters from different fandoms you know I'm familiar with, and I'll give you a dialogue between them, without justifying how the crossover would work, how their worlds clashed, or how they could even meet each other--just a silly crossover conversation for fun with no backstory.

Cally and Spock for jaxomsride

"They are driven by emotions rather than logic."

"Really?" Cally was surprised. "My humans tend to suppress their feelings. I do not think it is healthy."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "You are suggesting then that Vulcans are not?"

"Oh, of course not! We are talking about humans. The Liberator crew spend a lot of energy pretending that they do not care for each other when it is obvious by their actions that they do. I think it is their society."

"Then your Federation appears to be more advanced than ours."

Cally was shocked. "They are ruled by fear! They are afraid to care because doing so gives the government a way to get at them."

"In that case it does not seem to have affected that one." Spock looked over to where Vila was flirting outrageously with Uhura, who was laughing delightedly.

"Oh yes? That is all surface. We know nothing about Vila's family and little about his past. Blake has suffered greatly yet hardly ever talks about it. As Vila would say, Avon does his best to function like the computers he used to work with, and Gan has not even told us the name of the woman he loved and failed to defend."

Spock was silent for a few moments. "Do you have an opening on your crew?"

Vila and Hiro Nakamura for mossymermaid

If you're interested, I already wrote a story with Hiro in the B7 universe: Save the Bounty Hunter, Save the Galaxy.

Vila took Hiro's arm and led him far enough away for the others not to hear. "Tell me, what's your secret?"

Hiro blinked at him owlishly. "My secret? Is gene."

"No, not the time travel thing. I mean being adorable."

Hiro's mouth made a small, round O.

"Oh come on, you saw how Cally and Jenna reacted when you appeared. They... squealed."

"Everybody surprised!"

"Those two have never squealed in their lives. Or jumped up and down while they did it. Or hugged me, I mean, anyone to my knowledge."

"Oh, sorry. That happen all time. Women rush up to me in street and cuddle me and run away."

"Yes, but why? Is it the glasses? The way your hair sticks up a bit? That knitted thing that looks like your mum made it?"

Hiro looked confused. "I do not know." His round face brightened like the sun coming out (and Cally and Jenna both said, "Awww, that is just so cute!"). "I know! It is geek leetness! Geeks very lovable now. Well, my now in past."

Vila looked over at Avon, who was slumped in his chair, glowering at them all. "Nah, that can't be it." He sighed, resigned. "It's a gene, isn't it."

Soolin and Rose for executrix

"Oh, pull yourself together and get over it. You're almost as annoying as that stupid Piri woman. Don't make me hit you."

Rose snuffled and wiped her red, swollen eyes and dripping nose. "How can you say that? I bet you've never lost someone you loved."

Soolin went very still. "No? How about watching them kill my parents and burn them with the house and drag my sister away?"

"Oh. Sorry." Rose was shocked out of her self-absorption--briefly. "But he loved me. I was special."

"He's a Time Lord. Your life is a tiny fraction of his."

"But I was special! I was his favourite!"

"That might well be true. I had a pet cat when I was little and I loved it dearly. I cried for days when it died." Soolin frowned at Rose. "Days, note. I loved it very much, but it wasn't exactly an equal."

Rose stared at her. "Are you saying I was a pet?"

"Something like that."

"How dare you!"

"Good. Be angry. It's better than moping about when you're alive and you have your family and Mickey and a new life."

Rose gaped at her.

"Start living it. I'm off. I have better things to do, like finding where my companions have got to." Soolin frowned, remembering. "Vila said something about torching some wood."

Stark and the Doctor for astrogirl2

Stark reached out to finger the long scarf. "Nice. And a good length too."

The Doctor revealed so many teeth that he leaped back, startled. "A Banik! Oh, it’s been centuries since I met a Banik! And a Stykera too, if I'm not mistaken."

Stark nodded and held out a hand, wrapped to hide the slave brands. "That's right. Stark."

The Doctor's eyes widened so much, Stark feared they would pop right out. "Stark! The Stark?"

"What?" Stark's own eye looked wildly around. "Is there another one?"

"No no no, just one Stark, liberator and leader of the Baniks..." The Doctor trailed off. "Ah. I seem to be a bit previous." He took off his scarf and draped it around Stark's neck. "Here you are." He patted Stark on the cheek. " Looks good on you. Don't worry, I have more of them in the TARDIS."

Stark blinked as the Doctor let himself into a blue box which promptly dematerialised, then shrugged and flung one end of the scarf over his shoulder and walked away. Nutter.

Martha and Blake for kerravonsen

I have grave doubts of my ability to write Martha.

"On the other hand," said Martha, "You could bring the whole Federation down single-handed and then he'd roll time back, or change something small in the past to make it all different."

Blake stared at her. "You mean he can rewrite history?"

"In a way, yeah."

"Oh don't worry. I've had the best in the Federation try that with me and it didn't work. I'm not giving up."

"Good for you! I spent a year which never happened saving the world." She flashed a dazzling smile at him. "Still worked, though."

Vila and Wash for van

I also have no confidence at all in my ability to write cowboy. But anyway, here goes.

"Nice shirt!"

"Why thank you! I c'n see you're a man o' taste."

Well, not exactly. Vila wondered how Avon would react to the sight of him in something that garish and grinned delightedly at the thought. He'd probably ram a probe right through the circuit board in his latest gadget. He looked around the cockpit with interest. "Dinosaurs!"

"Yup. They're my lucky charms."

"They work?"

"So far."

Vila sat down in the co-pilot's seat and reached into a breast pocket, then held his hand out. "Tarsian warg, warg strangler, Kairoan spider, wolf-snake."

"Shiny!" Wash stroked the spider's egg-sac.

Vila pointed to each one in turn. "Fred, Tarrant, Brian, and Whippy. D'you name yours?"

Wash grinned at him. "Y'know, no one bothered to ask me that before?" He touched a finger to each dinosaur in turn. "OK, this here’s Susie, and Wilbur, and Millicent, and this big one's Jayne."

Vila snorted. "Looks like him." He looked sideways at Wash. "Want a game?"

"Hell, yeah!"

The Fourth Doctor and Blake for sallymn

There seems to be a preponderance of Doctor Who. :-P

"Who the hell are you? And how did you get into my base?"

"I'm the Doctor. Awfully sorry, but the TARDIS has a mind of her own. Just came here." The man smiled toothily and not quite sanely.

Blake tried to work out what he was talking about and gave up. "DEVA!"

"I assure you, I'm not. I might enjoy a little drama occasionally, but--"

"What is it, Blake?" Deva came in, looking harried.

"Ah, Blake! You're Blake!"

"What of it?"

"It all makes sense now."

"Not to me, it doesn't."

"Look, if a fellow called Avon turns up here, don't tell him you set all this up for him."

"But I did! I've been recruiting criminals just so that if he--"

The Doctor wagged a finger at him. "Just don't. Believe me." His face lost its brief seriousness. "Right, I'll be on my way, then." He tossed Blake a crumpled paper bag. "Here, you look as if you need some jelly babies."

Donna and Vila for lizamanynames

"I don't believe it! I don't bloody believe it!" Donna waved her arms wildly, and Vila ducked just in time. "I finally get a date with a nice bloke who, you never know, mightn't actually try to feed me to insects, and what happens? I end up on a bloody spaceship again, that's what!" She glared around the teleport bay. "Right, where is he?"

Vila gaped at her.

"He's not here is he, with his magic blue box?"

Vila shook his head.

"And are you going to get me back to the Trattoria Siciliana by 7 o'clock?" Donna put her hands on her hips. "No, I thought not. He'll be waiting! He'll think I stood him up! Do you have any idea how pissed off I am?"

Vila nodded.

"Wish I'd never seen this bloody thing in the market." She shoved her wrist in Vila's face, forcing him to step back or get a bright pink teleport crystal up the nose. "You!" Donna poked him. "Cat got your tongue? You ever say anything?"

Vila had had enough. "Tell you what, give me a fish slice and I'll see if I can squeeze a word in."

This meme is now closed.
Tags: meme - fannish
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